What do I do if my wife is withholding sex from me?

When my wife is having a bad day, she will withhold sex from me. I believe that my needs should be met regardless of what I’ve done to make her mad. Is this a fair stance?

It is a pretty normal for any of us to not feel like having sex when we are not happy with our spouse for some reason. But denying your spouse sex is not the appropriate way to manage your emotions. Sex within a marital relationship is not yours to withhold. When you made the covenant to marry your spouse you virtually gave up the rights to your body. The Bible is clear in 1 Corinthians 7:2-6 where it says

The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality

Published by

Joseph Follette

As a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist I have the privilege of talking to people and helping them make positive changes in their lives. I'm glad to be a part of helping people become all that God wants them to be. Don't hesitate to contact me if you need my services. (256) 850-4426 www.LifestyleTherapyCoach.com Get a copy of my recently published book, "The Sizzle Mindset: Seven Secrets to Keep the Passion Alive in Your Marriage". BUY NOW

2 thoughts on “What do I do if my wife is withholding sex from me?”

  1. ALICIA LOMACK says:

    I agree that our body is not our own once we become married, however, I do believe that there are times when one spouse requires sex more frequently than the other and it can become hard to find a balance. There may be women who no longer have a menstrual cycle and do not receive the opportunity to get that break, so when is their healing process? Should they have a headache for that week to avoid sex and get a break, to avoid declining there husband’s advances? Sometimes we do not want to say no, but while engaging in intercourse, the other can clearly see that their spouse is not interested or daydreaming. Humans are emotional people and sometimes just cannot separate their emotions from reality. At that point, I would suggest that they should seek counseling to mediate their differences and move forward together as one.

    1. admin says:

      Sometimes it is hard for couples to communicate with one another particularly about topics concerning their conflicting needs. Sex is certainly one of those topics. As a man if I had to chose between not having sex and having sex with an uninterested wife I would gladly take the latter. If the couple’s sexual routine lacks love and affection then the couple has big problems. I agree, it’s time for therapy. Without intervention more symptoms of the problem continue to surface.

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