Would you believe that between 18 and 24 million Americans are sex addicts? That means nearly 1 in 18 people are struggling with sexually compulsive behaviors. The sad part of this reality is the impact this compulsion has on marriage. Every day a spouse learns that the love of their life has been unfaithful to their vows. No matter whether their involvement was virtual or in person, it is no less devastating.
I have been helping couples facing this reality for many years now. I have great news. An affair or sexual addiction doesn’t have to mean the end of your marriage. But it does mean you have to be willing to let your marriage go. This may seem to be a contradiction but it isn’t. An affair is an addiction – a addiction to a person, a behavior, a thought or emotion. It is being driven by a false reality. Under the spell of the delusion of our own thoughts and emotions we all have the potential of being irrational and pathetic. If you are not happy in your relationship take action to make some changes. Don’t go out and start up another relationship with someone else. End one relationship before you start another. That’s much more rational and much less stressful. The reason why people get caught up in affairs is because they are unwilling to let go of their current relationship. The reason why injured spouses often experience multiple affairs with their spouse is because they have not come to a point of being willing to let go of the relationship. Holding on to something that isn’t yours is irrational. Once one partner lets go the cycle of addiction is broken. Now we can move on to address the real issues or let go of each other altogether.
Learning to let go is what I help people do. I help people see life without what they have held on so tightly to. Once a person experiences this freedom stress instantly goes away. Everybody is now responsible for themselves and their own happiness.
If you are someone you know is acting out sexually, whether in an all out affair or simply flirting sexually with others in person or virtually, I have a treatment option. Registration for my Fall sex addiction recovery program is now open. Call (256) 850-4426 to set up a Phone Consulatation. A family is a terrible thing to waste.